Because of the craziness of our struggles with porn and other hang
ups it’s easy to begin to believe that we’ve come to the end of God’s grace and committed the unpardonable sin. I know that I’ve turned to that passage in Matthew that describes how we can go too far (Matthew 12:31-32) to check and see if indeed I had crossed that line. It’s a frightening thought to say the least. But I believe it is much harder to get there than we think. My guess is, if you are wondering whether or not you’ve gone too far you haven’t (someone who has gone too far won’t care). But that isn’t to say that the voice of God isn’t fading and that you can just ignore those promptings.
I wrote this in response to an email I received recently from a young guy who was afraid that he had committed the unpardonable sin because of his continued failures with porn:
Thanks for your note! Great question. I would say that you likely have not committed the unpardonable sin. Without truly knowing your heart (which is impossible for me, but not for God) it is hard to know for sure just where you are. But the simple fact that you are inquiring and seeking an answer tells me that God is still at work. The issue with the unpardonable sin is the individual’s hardness of heart and unwillingness to hear God and respond in repentance. It doesn’t sound like that is the case with you. It sounds like you have a sin problem and want to deal with it but you are having a difficult time allowing God to make the change.
You are dealing with deeply ingrained sin that doesn’t go away over night. God also has a bigger plan in mind. In other words God is in the business of total life transformation not just abstinence from sinning! That means his process requires a brokenness which often takes a bit of time and chaos. I believe that God is faithful to us through all of this even when we are unfaithful. Just look at the OT and how many times His chosen people turned their backs on Him.
That isn’t to say that our sin doesn’t distance us from God or that we don’t miss out on God’s best when we are carried off by our acting out. The problem with porn and other sin is that it destroys intimacy with God. It kills our relationship with him. We tend to shy away and isolate ourselves from Him and others and wonder “where is God?”. When in reality our sin and selfishness have moved us far away.
While I know that it is possible to become so hardened and carnal as to turn away God. I also believe that God has something more in mind. As I traveled the same journey I refused to believe that God didn’t hear me or didn’t care for me. I would tell you the same and I believe it is true for you. II Peter 3:9 says that God is “longsuffering” toward us not willing that any should perish but that all should come to repentance. That is a powerful promise man! Claim it and go before God now in prayer regardless of what you’ve done (or how long ago you did it).
Having said that the gospel of Matthew talks about the need to “produce fruit in keeping with repentance” which basically means now that I’ve made a turn around I need to MOVE in that direction with INTENTIONALITY!! So the question is what are you legitimately doing to deal with your sin problem both at the HEART level and the practical outward behavior level?
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